


Interlude: Boundaries

by annalore



Series: Roads Untraveled [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Hogwarts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-12-10
Updated: 2004-12-10
Packaged: 2019-07-15 08:08:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16059017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annalore/pseuds/annalore
Summary: There ought to be boundaries to friendship.





	Interlude: Boundaries

Sometimes Remus hates Sirius.

Sirius is not an easy friend. His moods are as changeable as they can be violent. His charm is as sparkling as his anger is stinging. But Remus has grown used to these things, grown used to the restive boredom and reckless pursuit of adventure. It is not those he hates.

Sometimes, Sirius acts like a starving man. He kisses with a clawing hunger, fucks as if his life depends on it. And afterwards he acts like it doesn’t matter at all. He’ll go off with James — because James is his best mate — and leave Remus behind, drained.

He’s gotten used to this too with time, but sometimes he really hates Sirius Black.

There ought to be boundaries to friendship. There ought to be clear lines. James and Sirius are constantly pulling and tearing at theirs, making the demarcation clear to all observers. Remus has no such comfort.

Sometimes they seem so distant, bumping against each other for want of closeness. Sometimes Remus is happy being one of Sirius’s pack, his second-best mate. And sometimes Sirius ignores all the rules and goes in — in, closer. Into the private places in Remus where there are no shields, and Remus is sure that Sirius and James have never been so _intimate_.

He ought to hate Sirius.

Sirius goes where he wants, does what he wants, with impunity. He demands without reason, expects as if it’s his right. He often takes too much and is always sorry later, until sorrow evaporates into need.

But when Remus is most vulnerable, when he would give and give and give until he’s turned himself inside out, when the lines have been blurred and erased so it’s almost like he’s in Sirius’s head and Sirius in his, Sirius touches gently, speaks softly. His kisses are like lazy summer afternoons, and it’s like sharing the same body, Sirius inside him and him inside Sirius, thoughts and feelings and senses melting into one.

It’s almost obscene, this intimacy. It’s almost unbearable. And it’s not even always the _sex_ , because Remus would understand that better. Better than he understands the process of pulling back, of redrawing the lines. Better than he understands being Sirius Black’s second-best mate.

Sometimes Remus really hates Sirius.


End file.
